when talking about pam, the first thought that comes to one’s mind is probably these simple facts: she was a receptionist and was a moderate artist. she barely advanced on her career and did not even finish the summer program for art, despite the fact that art was her passion. often, these facts are used to invalidate her position as the ‘correct’ partner for her husband and bestfriend — jim.
some also claim that pam is a cheater, referring to her and jim’s situation prior to her break up with her ex fiance, roy. of course, there is no excuse for cheating, thus i would not refute the claim that pam cheated on roy with jim the moment she kissed jim back. i do, though, want to remind everyone of how pam and roy’s relationship was. roy is often caught as someone who is abrasive and emotional, and oftentimes treats pam badly.
he left her alone during their first date, threatened that she would sleep in the car if she didn’t give him the basketball during the basketball episode of the office, and worst of all, smashed a mirror that was right next to pam when she told him that she and jim had kissed, and most obvious of all, did not even decide on a wedding date for such a long time; leaving her to become that one co-worker who only got the ring but not the wedding. when he did eventually decide on a date, he did nothing to help her in planning the wedding. if you ask me, their break up was bound to come one way or another.
again, i am not going to excuse the cheating, but i cannot bring myself to be vindictive against her knowing how badly she was treated and how wary she was of roy during their time together. she was, in actuality, a victim of a toxic relationship, thus it makes sense that she would react in unhealthy way — nothing about her relationship with roy was healthy.
i also would not blame her for the fallout between jim and karen, knowing that karen herself knew of the fact that jim was still in love with pam when they started dating, and still went to date him anyway, and jim, despite knowing that he was still in love with pam, still went on to date somebody new which ended up with him making karen his rebound, essentially. pam’s breakdown was, for me, a time bomb that blew up after years of failed attempts of detonation. i think pam was very obviously on her last strike, and jim’s cold treatment towards her served as the final blow. and even then, her breakdown and her telling jim that she called off her wedding for him did not singlehandedly turn her into a homewrecker, because again, jim and karen’s relationship was not established on even grounds. she did not act like she was owed a relationship by jim, she merely wanted her friend back.
unfortunately, jim seemed to unable to differentiate platonic vs romantic love (or could it have been that his love for pam already ran so deep, that the lines started to blur?)
now regarding whether she is the best fit for jim: i personally think she is. she did spend more time with jim, their love grew from platonic to romantic love by the course of their years together, so falling in love is the most natural thing to do for a pair of best friends who truly understand and accept each other. of course, logically, karen is a good fit for jim in regards of their career, but love isn’t supposed to be logical, is it? jim and pam are happy with their choices, and karen is eventually happy with hers. personally, i’m satisfied with their endings.
